Brett and I just ducked in a Starbucks real quick to focus our minds for a few minutes. It has been a full Day 1, 2013... you've been so good to us already. So far, we've made Raspberry and Strawberry Pancakes with my best friend and her fiance. We played shuffle board in our empty dorm soon to be filled with I-don't-know-what-freshmen-crazies-that-I-love. We spent some money on Brett's Christmas gift cards for new clothes and then proceeded to argue in the car afterwards about how frustrating clothes can be, why we think we need them, how frustrated I'll be for the rest of my life because I will never find contentment from having enough clothes to fit the fashion curve, and how it brings me great joy to shop with and dress Brett even though we both struggle with buying clothes when others are in want for them. After hot cheeks and annoyed tones turned forgiving, we decided we will struggle through this and fight for understanding in what it means to BUY clothes as we grow together and understand each other's perspectives more. I'll have to admit though, after this Christmas season's commercials, too many issues of Vogue and Jcrew, and blog stalking, my "I WANT" monster inside of me is going crazy. A covet poison has been filling my veins slowly but surely and today, walking through the mall I felt overcome with "I don't have's".
And then I sat down, with a nasty tasting vanilla latte, and started reading my little gratitude book I've been moving through slowly. And of course, I read those beautiful and freeing words... that choosing to name that which is grateful is really a way of listing all the ways God loves me. And immediately I hung my head and a burden of discontentment was lifted. And my heart started racing for that which I was deeply grateful for. And with gratitude is how I want to start out the new year.
For warm Starbucks. For handsome blue eyes staring back at me. For the chance to see Les Miserables and be reminded of fighting for justice. For gray skies and birds that fly together in patterns. For the barista who smiled at me. For pancakes. For kind words after hard conversations.